A yawancin gidajen aure, akwai wata matsala da ake raina ta sosai amma tana da babban tasiri ga farin cikin mace da zaman lafiyar aure—wato yawan gaggawa yayin jima’i.
Wasu maza na ganin cewa jima’i abu ne mai sauƙi: a fara, a ƙare, a huta.
Amma a hakikanin gaskiya, jikin mace ba ya aiki kamar na namiji, kuma rashin fahimtar hakan na iya lalata jin daɗinta kwata-kwata.
Bambancin Halittar Namiji Da Mace
Namiji:
Sha’awarsa na tashi da sauri
Yana iya kaiwa gamsuwa cikin ɗan lokaci
Mace:
Sha’awarta na buƙatar lokaci
Tana buƙatar shiri na hankali da na jiki
Idan aka yi gaggawa, jikinta ba ya samun damar karɓar jin daɗi
Wannan bambanci ne da Allah Ya halitta, ba laifi ba ne, amma rashin kula da shi matsala ce.
Ta Yaya Gaggawa Ke Lalata Jin Daɗin Mace?
- Jikinta Ba Ya Samun Lokacin Shirye-shirye
Mace tana buƙatar:
nutsuwa,
kwanciyar hankali,
kusanci da sannu.
Idan aka yi gaggawa, jikinta ba ya samun damar yin abin da ya kamata domin jin daɗi. - Zafi Maimakon Jin Daɗi
A lokuta da dama, gaggawa na jawo:
rashin shirye-shiryen jiki,
bushewa,
jin zafi.
Wannan na iya sa mace ta fara ƙin jima’i gaba ɗaya, ba don bata son mijinta ba, sai don tsoron zafi. - Rashin Gamsuwa
Idan mace bata samu gamsuwa ba:
tana jin an yi watsi da ita,
tana jin ba a damu da bukatarta ba,
tana iya fara ɗaukar jima’i a matsayin aiki, ba ni’ima ba. - Rage Sha’awar Mace
Yawan gaggawa yana koyar da kwakwalwar mace cewa:
“Jima’i ba ya da daɗi.”
A hankali sha’awarta na raguwa, har ta fara guje wa kusanci da mijinta. - Lalacewar Sadarwa Tsakanin Ma’aurata
Idan ba a tattauna wannan matsala ba:
mace tana shiru tana jin haushi,
namiji yana tunanin komai lafiya,
sai tazara ta shiga tsakanin zuciyoyi.
Me Addini Ke Koyarwa Game Da Hakan?
Manzon Allah ﷺ ya koyar da:
tausayi,
kulawa,
la’akari da jin daɗin mace.
Malaman addini sun bayyana cewa namiji ya gamsar da matarsa kamar yadda yake gamsar da kansa, domin jima’i ibada ce idan aka yi ta da niyya mai kyau.
Yaya Namiji Zai Guji Wannan Matsalar?
Ya rage gaggawa
Ya fara da kusanci da sannu
Ya kula da yanayin zuciyar matarsa
Ya fahimci cewa jima’i tafiya ce, ba gudu ba
Ya saurari matarsa idan ta yi magana
Saƙo Ga Maza
Namiji na gaske ba wanda ya fi sauri ba ne,
wanda ya fi kulawa ne.
Gamsar da mace ba rauni ba ne—hikima ce. - Abun Lura:
Yawan gaggawa ba wai kawai yana rage jin daɗin mace ba,
yana iya:
lalata sha’awa,
rage soyayya,
kawo sanyi a aure.
Idan ma’aurata suka fahimci juna, suka ba juna lokaci da kulawa, jima’i zai zama tushen ƙauna, ba dalilin sabani ba.
